Ever had something happen in your life that is freaks everyone out that you want to tell about it? You wonder if it might not be important to tell, because later on it might be pertinent, or elaborated on, and what happened took up too much time and space in your life to escape mention. Like I had a brief period where I was in a cult. (I was never in a cult. This isn't the thing- it's an example of a kind of thing.) A big thing that's maybe stigmatized and the kind of thing that apparently no matter HOW you mention it often freaks everybody out a little. I have tried to be forthcoming with info about my life in the past year with 2 different friends from the internet that I have always felt very close too,and can I tell you, there is a space I occupy since I sent out those emails, and the soundtrack in that space is that of DEAFENING crickets.
So what do I learn from this? Do I not tell any of my friends about it because it because of potential freakouts? Because there are more people I'm close to that I probably need to tell, and it's not because I need their support or their sympathy. It's not so they can be proud of me or sorry for me, but I feel they should know because that's what happened. It's history, and for all I know there might one day be a test. As I wait for a nibble on the two lines I've cast out now, I wonder if there's a way to fish with a net instead.
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